Just Say It

Here I am past midnight, glued to my iPad, trying to ignore the anxiety that won't leave me alone tonight. I have checked emails, crossed off to-do lists, and cleared the much visible track of clutter I leave behind me with every step I take. 

It caught me off guard tonight, this anxiety, out of nowhere, like a thief in the night. And now, I can't sleep. Much to my disadvantage,  my heart is beating at what seems to be a hundred miles per hour, my legs are achy, and I'm hungry. Could it be that my body is reacting to something that I have not made myself aware of yet? Like my nerves for finals? Or perhaps I am too excited about my dreams and goals to even let myself catch a breath! Whatever it may be, I find myself breathing in and out, counting to ten, and trying to reassure myself that this too shall pass. What seems like an eternity with this anxiety is nothing but a moment passing away.

Now, as I find a way to distract myself from the loud beating of my pounding heart, I can honestly say that today was a great day. Nothing out of the ordinary happened; I went to work, made a few people laugh, went to school and survived, made a few Avon deliveries, and bam! I was home. Safe and sound. I had the great privileged of owning a shower and using it, soft pjs to match, and a comfy bed that doesn't creak when I move an inch. Today was great. But now comes the hard part, falling asleep. 

Should I read? Pray? Meditate? Pray seems to be the best answer. I mean, I have a Friend who's always there to listen and I barely take up the offer. What kind of relationship is that? A whack one if you ask me! So as I lay here reminiscing about my day and sharing with you guys, I am reminded that when I am most anxious, most bored, most anything, I have a listening ear on speed dial, even when I can't find words,  He understands. Ah, that did the trick. I am more at ease now, more relaxed. Seems like just being still and knowing that He is God (Psalm 46:10), is enough to calm the seas of  my raging heart. 

As I prepare for bed, I wanna leave you guys with a song, a song about the name Jesus. There is power in it, even when we don't know what to say. Even when the anxieties of life seem to trap us, the name Jesus just calms the storm and brings peace. If you haven't experienced
 it for yourself, just say it, think it, believe it, and He will be there.